Accountability: The Leadership Skill No One Wants to Master

Accountability—it's the leadership skill everyone knows they need, but no one really wants to embrace. 

Why? 

Because holding your team accountable is HARD. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from working with countless teams, it’s that the gap in accountability usually starts at the top. 

Let’s face it: holding someone accountable is uncomfortable. It can feel confrontational, and most of us aren’t exactly eager to dive into conflict. In fact, according to a recent Harvard Business study, only 13% of leaders feel confident in their ability to hold others accountable effectively. That’s a startlingly low number, and it highlights just how widespread this struggle is. So if you’re avoiding accountability, you’re not alone. 

But why do so many leaders stumble when it comes to accountability?

Why We Struggle to Hold People Accountable

1. We Want to Believe the Best in People. It’s human nature to give others the benefit of the doubt. We assume that people have good intentions, that they’ll get it right next time, or that whatever issue we’re facing is a one-time thing. So, instead of addressing the problem, we let it slide, hoping it’ll resolve itself. Spoiler alert: it usually doesn’t.
   
   
2. We Assume They Understand Our Expectations. Another common pitfall is assuming that our expectations are crystal clear. We think, “They should know what I want by now.” But here’s the truth: if someone isn’t meeting your expectations, there’s a good chance they don’t actually understand them. And instead of clarifying, we might label them as lazy, unmotivated, or just not a “fit” for the role, adding these assumptions to a mental list that often does more harm than good.
   
   
3. We Want to Be Seen as Gracious. No one wants to be the leader who’s constantly cracking down on their team. We want to be fair, understanding, and forgiving—sometimes to a fault. But when we give someone a second, third, or even fourth chance without addressing the root issue, we’re inadvertently telling our top performers that their hard work doesn’t really matter. That’s a dangerous message to send.
   
   
4. We Fear the Repercussions. There’s also the fear factor: what if holding someone accountable makes me look like the office tyrant? What if it demoralizes the team? These are valid concerns, but they’re often exaggerated in our minds. In reality, when done correctly, accountability can be one of the most motivating forces within a team.
   
   
5. It’s Just Plain Difficult and Awkward. At the end of the day, holding someone accountable is a form of conflict, and conflict is uncomfortable. It’s easier, in the moment, to “let it go” and avoid that discomfort. But this avoidance doesn’t make the issue disappear—it just delays the inevitable.

The Deeper Issues at Play

As Patrick Lencioni discusses in The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, the challenges around accountability often stem from deeper issues, such as a lack of trust, healthy conflict, or commitment to common goals. When these foundational elements are missing, it becomes incredibly difficult to hold people accountable because there’s no solid ground to stand on.

But here’s the thing: while accountability is hard, it’s also crucial. If we can overcome the reasons we shy away from it and work towards building environments that prioritize trust, authenticity, and clear expectations, we unlock a host of benefits for our teams.

Why Accountability Matters

1. It Builds Trust. Radical honesty and authenticity are non-negotiables for team trust, and trust is the bedrock of any healthy team. Accountability starts with the leader. If you don’t hold your team members accountable, trust will erode, and with it, the effectiveness of your team.
   
   
2. It Sets Everyone Up for Success. Accountability goes hand in hand with clear expectations. When your team knows exactly what’s expected of them—goals, deadlines, roles—they have the information they need to succeed. This clarity makes it easier to have straightforward conversations about progress (or the lack thereof).
   
   
3. It Creates a Culture of Responsibility. When team members see that accountability is the norm, they’re more likely to take responsibility for their actions. This creates a culture where everyone knows they’ll be called out if they’re not meeting expectations, which can drive higher performance and engagement.
   
   
4. It Demonstrates Value and Appreciation. Holding someone accountable isn’t about being harsh; it’s about showing that you care enough about the work—and the rest of the team—to address underperformance. This not only motivates the individual in question but also shows the rest of the team that their efforts are valued.
   
   
5. It Encourages Healthy Conflict and Resilience. By addressing issues head-on, you create an environment where healthy conflict is welcomed, not avoided. This gives both you and your team members the opportunity to practice handling difficult conversations, building resilience, and improving team dynamics over time.

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About Lindsay Harris and Leader Haven

An Executive Coach and Certified Working Genius Facilitator, Lindsay established Leader Haven to help leaders generate more joy at work. With experience coaching hundreds of executives, Lindsay is on a mission to build The Joy Generation—a generation of all ages that seeks to generate joy at work through inner work, trust building, renewed collaboration, and healthy empowerment.